


Growing Old

by Ren



Series: 15 Songs [2]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-11-20
Updated: 2010-11-20
Packaged: 2017-10-13 07:22:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/134491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ren/pseuds/Ren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>You touch these tired eyes of mine / And map my face out line by line / And somehow growing old feels fine</i> (Yes, lyrics as a summary. In my defence, it's a <i>song meme</i>.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Growing Old

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a song meme on Livejournal: denija gave me the song _I'm Yours_ by The Script. It's scarily fitting, even more so because I always thought that _I'm Yours Tonight_ was Jack's song. So I couldn't help turning this into a Jack/Ianto fic.

Ianto never thought he'd be one of those people who look at their faces in the mirror each morning with growing panic, afraid to see the first white hair or line at the corner of his eyes. But lately he does, unfailingly, every single day.

So far he hasn't noticed any signs of aging. There is no reason why he would, he's not even thirty yet. That's what he keeps repeating himself. It's not as reassuring as it should be, especially when he remembers that thirty years are nothing to Jack.

It shouldn't bother Ianto as much as it does. After all, he's the one who was wishing for death, time and again during those dark months in his life when everything seemed so pointless and even breathing was a constant pain.

The only thing that had stopped him from pointing a gun at his own head and pulling the trigger had been Jack. Always Jack.

At first because Jack was in charge of Torchwood and could give him access to the technology he needed. Then because he wanted his revenge against Jack for ruining his life. And in the end because Jack was, well, Jack.

Ianto is less surprised by the fact that he's fallen in love with Jack than by the fact that it has taken him so long.

In a way, it's perfect: Jack will never die, and Ianto will never have to go through the same pain that was losing Lisa. Jack will still be here, alive and unchanged, in thirty, fifty, a hundred years' time.

On the other hand, Jack will never die. He'll still be here, long after Ianto and everyone else is gone. He has no idea how Jack can stand that, and sometimes he looks into Jack's eyes and sees something that tells him that Jack has no idea either.

Ianto looks in the mirror, but he doesn't know what to do when he'll start showing signs that he really is aging. Every time he's gathered enough courage to break the subject with Jack, he has brushed it off saying it will be fine.

Ianto isn't quite so sure about that, but he used to think he'd never fall in love with anyone else after Lisa either.

And sometimes when they're together it seems as if time is stopping, even if just for a minute, and in those brief moments Ianto thinks that maybe, just maybe, everything will be fine.


End file.
